The Story of Elena: The Journey to True Love

Elena had always believed that love was an act of boundless giving, a continuous sacrifice for others. From a young age, she had been the loyal friend, the daughter who never stopped caring for her parents, the colleague always ready to help her peers—always putting others' needs before her own. Yet, despite being surrounded by people who cared for her, she felt a persistent void, a sense of emptiness that all her giving couldn’t seem to fill.

Although everyone admired her generosity, Elena began to wonder whether they truly cared for her as a person or simply for what she could offer. She had lost touch with herself, her identity so intertwined with others' expectations that she couldn’t recall what truly made her happy. She often questioned why, despite being so loved, she never felt truly fulfilled.

One day, after a long conversation with her friend Laura, Elena was struck by words that resonated deeply within her. Laura, who had gone through her own journey of self-discovery, said something Elena had never heard so clearly before:

“Elena, love isn’t just about what you give; it’s about what you can receive. To give true love, you first need to learn how to love yourself. It’s not selfish—it’s the foundation for everything else.”

Those words stayed with Elena for days. It was hard for her to imagine how she could love herself in a way that wasn’t selfish or vain, but something deep inside her told her there was more to discover. She decided to embark on a journey she didn’t fully understand but felt was the only path to a more fulfilling life.

In the early days of her self-discovery, Elena faced many internal obstacles. She was so used to caring for others that she felt guilty every time she took time for herself. But as she ventured into new experiences, she began to understand that it wasn’t about putting others second—it was about learning to nurture herself, to acknowledge her own desires and needs.

She started dedicating time to meditate and reflect on her life and emotions. Slowly, she rediscovered hobbies she had completely forgotten, like painting and writing. She began caring for her body more attentively, not just to look good but because it felt necessary for her well-being. Gradually, something shifted within her. She no longer relied on external validation to feel worthy, and she began uncovering an inner strength she had always possessed.

Elena realized that self-love wasn’t about seeking perfection but embracing her humanity—with all its flaws and virtues. She learned to be her own friend, to care for herself as she cared for others, without expecting anything in return—just for the simple recognition of her own worth.

Over time, her life transformed. Her relationships were no longer a burden or a constant means of validation. She could now give love from a place of internal abundance, without fear of losing herself in the process. She began surrounding herself with people who appreciated her for who she was, not just for what she could do for them.

It was during this time that she met Andrés. He was kind and generous, and although at first, she thought he might be just another relationship aimed at filling a void, she realized something had changed within her. She no longer needed his love to feel whole—there were no expectations, no fear of losing herself. She simply enjoyed his company, and most importantly, she felt capable of receiving his love without feeling the need to "earn it."

Her relationship with Andrés was unlike any she had experienced before. It wasn’t about dependent love but a genuine bond based on mutual respect and acceptance of each other as they were. Elena discovered that by learning to love herself, she could offer a truer, deeper love.

Looking in the mirror, Elena saw a different woman. She was no longer just the one who gave without limits; she was a woman who knew her worth and was willing to share her life with someone who appreciated her from the same place. She understood that true love didn’t come from the need to fill voids but from the abundance already present in her heart.

Elena lived her life with a newfound inner peace, knowing that the most important love was the one she gave herself. Only by achieving that internal harmony could she see that, in the end, true love arrives when we can offer it from the fullness of who we are. And so, the emptiness she had felt for so long disappeared because by loving herself, Elena had finally found what she had always been searching for: a genuine, unconditional, and deeply meaningful love.

Elena’s story mirrors the ideas presented by Erich Fromm in his book The Art of Loving, specifically his concept of self-love. Fromm explains that self-love should not be confused with selfishness or vanity; rather, it is an act of recognition and care for oneself, essential for establishing healthy relationships with others.

In Elena’s case, her life reflects a constant search for external validation. She always gave love to others but felt an inner void because she did not value herself. This void exemplifies what Fromm describes: when a person does not love themselves, they cannot give genuine love or fully receive it. Like many others, Elena had built her life around the expectations and needs of others, neglecting her own.

As Fromm asserts, Elena began to understand that self-love is not a selfish act but a fundamental process for being able to give true love to others. Her journey toward self-love began when she chose to focus on her well-being, care for her body and mind, and recognize her inherent worth, independent of external approval. According to Fromm, this process allowed her to create space in her life for genuine love, both for herself and others.

Fromm also emphasizes that self-love is rooted in self-understanding and the acceptance of oneself, with all faults and virtues. In Elena’s story, this acceptance arrives when she learns to view her imperfections and strengths with compassion. She stops striving for perfection and instead allows herself to be human, understanding that true love is born from authenticity and self-respect. This approach aligns with Fromm’s teachings: self-love emerges when we care for ourselves and treat ourselves with respect and dignity.

Finally, Elena’s relationship with Andrés exemplifies what Fromm describes as true love—love that is not based on need or dependency but arises from a state of wholeness. Elena no longer seeks Andrés’s approval or that of anyone else because she has learned to love and accept herself. By doing so, she is able to offer a freer and more selfless love, something Fromm considers essential for authentic relationships. Thus, Elena’s story aligns with Fromm’s proposition that self-love is the foundation upon which genuine love for others is built.

Elena’s transformation, as she learns to love herself, is a direct reflection of Fromm’s teachings in *The Art of Loving*. Self-love is the cornerstone that enables the formation of deep and healthy relationships, both with oneself and with others.